Grandma P's Ramblings Through Life

Did you hear the one about the Portugese and the davenport?
It was something that took a lot of our consideration this afternoon.
A couple came into the shop to look around.
They returned to the desk and asked Bill what the best price would be on the davenport?
It was just as well that I was at the desk too, for Bill hadn't a clue what a davenport was!
There may be a good chance that you don't know either. Later Bill said it just a desk with a fancy name.


This is very much like the one in our shop.
It is Victorian.



















So we phoned the dealer for the best price. It was not a price our Portugese man wanted to hear.
He would think about it.....there were other davenports in the street.
Off they went.
Later the couple were back. Now then, what is the very best price?
So, I phoned again and he was quoted a very good price - quite a reduction. Come on Mr Portugese, nobody is in the trade to actually give you things!
He went away again.
The next I knew another man entirely was really studying the davenport. Two potential buyers in one afternoon.....can't be true.
And it wasn't. This man was from a shop along the road, which specialises in desks. He was checking it out for Mr Portugese.
It seemed it passed its inspection.
Soon Mr Portugese was back.......with a credit card, which we are not equipped to take.
"Oh, how can I pay? The bank will only allow me a certain amount at each withdrawal."
But his wife went to the bank and came back with the full amount.
By this time Mr Portugese was trying to offer even less than the very good price he had been quoted.
The dealer (yes I was on the phone again) would have nothing of the lower offer.
Eventually the money (the full amount) was in the safe and the man from the desk shop was collecting it in order to do a modification on it. And he would deliver it to Mr Portugese's daughter.
But we hadn't lost our Portugese couple yet.
They were supposed to picking up a grandson from school. They were late.
I phoned for taxis - who couldn't come immediately.
Bill actually offered to take them instead.
But they hadn't finished. They needed to go to Boots to buy a thermometer.
When they returned they asked again about a taxi.
So I phoned another company who would send a taxi as soon as they could.
After about 2 hours they were gone.
Life is never dull!

Now for some pictures to amuse those who have backgrounds in the same town as me.
Last week I shared with you a picture of the old cinema on its way to total demolition.
Today I can share 3 pictures which are steeped in nostalgia. Suddenly I felt I was there again for an evening at the pictures











It all looks so familiar. I can feel the seats, see the colours of the curtains, see the little clock which told you that minutes were ticking away to the last bus home.






The foyer.



The upstairs lounge. It felt very grand to see the films from the balcony seats.
As we see, the pictures were in a book. I don't know which book at the moment.

I will always try to share pictures that I now see on the Memories of Crawley group when I see them as particularly interesting.
But remember you ( a few of you)  could be seeing all the photos, comments and memories if you were on facebook.
You could be on facebook just for this group.....you don't have to be a facebook friend with anybody.

The sun was shining.
I thought it might be a good idea to walk into town to see The Remembrance Day parade.
We attended the ceremonies around Chichester war memorial once, having walked from the cathedral. It had felt very moving.
Sadly today's effort was a let down.
We arrived in the High Street as groups of cadets assembled. There were a few old men carrying the standard flags and groups of lads and girls.
They paraded down the driveway into the grounds of St. John's Church, but instead of  taking postions around the war memorial went straight into the church.
Hundreds of people waited outside - including Bill and me.
We stood, waiting for things to happen.
The eleven o'clock chimes rung out - no last post on  a bugle - and the Rector of the church then began to speak from within the church with his voice being relayed out to the throng by a dodgy loudspeaker.
He stopped and we all observed silence....for how long? I don't know, there was nothing to indicate that the traditional 2 minutes was up.
In Chichester the silence was observed by all standing round the war memorial, with flags lowered - just as it is at The Cenotaph in London.
There was some slight embarrassment, as people began to whisper to each other and then talk normally amongst themselves. Were they speaking too soon?
Then the Rector, in typical pompous rector type voice, began his sermon. It went on and on and on. Maybe he had some important things to say, but people outside were not listening. In fact as time went on, most of them drifted away.
Just as you though he might be about to stop, he began again.
It was not what people needed.
They needed time and space for their own thoughts, not his.
Eventually we also drifted away. I am not good at standing still and my back was aching dreadfully. We had been standing for three quarters of an hour.
We popped into a couple of shops...I bought envelopes in Poundland for use in the shop.
Then we just desperately needed to sit down.
Wetherspoons was calling!
It was the last day of their beer festival - an opportunity to try real ales from local breweries. You could buy 3 one third pint glasses of different beers. I enjoyed that. I ordered a small bowl of beer battered onion rings to go with it. Bill stuck to what he knew - toasted sandwich, chips and capuccino.
It wasn't long before I spied Bill's cousin, Sue. I did think I saw her husband Chris at the door of the church earlier. They had been inside - dignitaries, don't you know! Chris is a local councillor and has been Mayor fairly recently.
Sue said there had been 3 hymns after the sermon which the organ played slowly, like an old gramophone winding down!
We had a great time with them and one of their friends - reminiscing about the town in the days of our youth.
Cousin Sue, having retired from teaching is also turning her hand to politics and will stand for the county council next year.
So a disappointing time turned into a lively time.
Here are a few of my photos. At least standing around with a crowd of people gave an opportunity for people watching, and I do like portraits.














































































































The verger.

David T.
Neighbour of Bill's when they they were boys.




























We walked back through the churchyard later, to see the poppy wreaths which had been laid.









































All mine!

We have been in Dorking today.
The shop was busy - lots of people about.
Almost everybody in the shop sold things today.
I am glad that Bill and I did because the week generally has not been very good.
It was a fun day.
There was me, Bill and Steve....and Claudia joined us at lunchtime.
This gave Bill and Steve the opportunity to pop out for a pint.
Conversation has been on the spooky side.
How come the sink in the kitchen had the spoons strewn over it?
Claudia had been in until closing time yesterday and spoons had been in their rightful place when she left.
Of course, of course - there must be a logical explanation. But a number of people have felt the presence of something at the back of the shop and it is not the first time that things were in illogical places. Why once were towels and tea towels laid out neatly across the floor?
Do we have a poltergeist?
Today I felt we were claiming to be sceptical and yet really wishing it could be true!
We could invite ghost hunters to spend the night in the place......that might boost the shop funds a bit!
My trips out from the shop were less interesting than Bill's to the pub. I have more Oragel with benzocaine.....and I notice the tube I bought today in boots has a much higher dose of the benzocaine than I had before. It really is the best way of firmly getting the denture in place without too much pain. I also went to Waitrose for more supplies of soft food.
I have mentioned going down to Brighton in the morning - but I think we might feel too lazy.
I have lots to catch up with.
Good to read a new blog - a happy nerd is rambling.

Stress is not good for health.
And I guess I have experienced stress in the last 2 or 3 weeks - quite a lot of stress.
The day began normally enough.
We went to East Grinstead to shop at Aldi and then enjoy a cuppa somewhere.
The cuppa part of the morning had to be deferred.
I was happily walking round Aldi, when wham! My pancreas flared up- very tight pains across the front of my waist;  I felt nauseous and faint and it turned into a migraine.
I travelled back in the car with hands tight over my eyes to keep the daylight out.
I feel so tired now - but stronger.
I shall have an early night.
I have spent some time sorting photos on the computer - Crawley photos. I have so many of them - and have been adding many more since joining the group.
I am so glad that there have been people out there taking pictures of the ordinary things of the town and the changes.
Maybe it will inspire Bill and I to take a closer watch again.
One change has occurred just this week.
A building gone full of many memories for a lot of people.






I remember seeing Dumbo there with my family when I was about 6.
My mother and I went together to see Oklahoma and Friendly Persuasion.
Bill and I had our first date there just over 50 years ago. We saw the film Exodus. I have just been reading up the plot - I couldn't remember at all what it was about. It seems it was a rather pro Zionist war/love film. The soundtrack was was powerful and very popular at the time.
It hasn't actually been a cinema for a while now - we have a multi screen cinema now.
But this one was a proper old fashioned cinema with plush carpets, ice cream sellers who walked round with their trays of wares. Seats in the balcony cost a bit more than downstairs.

Well, it is the day after.
I have thought about Harry cat - strange to come back home and not check out where he might be dozing.
Having said that we arrived back home tells you that we went out.
And it was a lovely day.
The Thursday car boot sale at Ford is so very relaxed - and there were a lot of sellers; maybe they had all checked out the Saturday weather forecast.
Today was a book and booklet day - only 1 item of china. I must get them photographed for EBay .
Breakfast was good. I gave instructions in Littlehampton Wetherspoons that the ham should not be cooked in my eggs benedict and it was perfect.
Early morning drizzle and we walked out of The George into bright sunshine and it felt much warmer than recently.
We walked along the beach and the river. It was delightful.


The sun was so bright that much was silhouetted against it.






















The tide was far out.







































The afternoon rather drifted away from me. All the books that I bought are unchecked and not yet written up.
Never mind.

I spent much of the night wishing for a death.
Then in the morning, when I saw Harry I felt desperate for at least one more week.
I guess I knew it was a vain hope - or why was I crying? I felt like my heart would break. How could I pick up little Harry and take him to die?
That's how he got his name, of course.....I picked him up.
The 2 little kittens came from Wiltshire, My brother bought them to us. Naturally Bill and I just wanted to pick them up, they were so enchanting. We decided that the one Bill picked up would be named after his father - that was George. And the little one I picked up was named after my father - Harry.


Dad did meet his namesake.




















George takes over parenting duties - giving Harry a wash.
















They were always together. And yet, Harry didn't seem to be at all concerned when George "disappeared".
Good old George, he saved us lots of heart ache by just dying, at home, during the night. That was two and half years ago now.
Harry didn't do that. This morning he gave me just a bit of hope. He was eager to lick the sauce from the expensive cat food I bought yesterday. And he ran down the stairs when he realised I had pulled the curtains without him. That was part of our routine - I would give him a cuddle and then take him to look out of each of the windows as I pulled the curtains.
But I cried.
We were at the vet's at 10 o'clock - me trying to suppress those tears.
Lawrence was just brilliant. But he did strongly advise not to wait - no week's reprieve.
I had to agree.
Whilst Lawrence was out of the room preparing things - guess what, I calmly took Harry to the window and talked to him about what we could see. We were actually being given that time together first.
Death came within seconds - very, very quick.
Lawrence said that this was a sure sign that his body had already shut down.
I continued to talk to him and stroke him. I felt we would have been given as much time as I needed.
But I was calm. We had done the right thing.
I so thank Lawrence for making the experience as peaceful and good as it possibly could be.
Huh! Just when we find a wonderful vet, we have no pets.
The first thing I did when we got home was to clear away all his dishes and the tray they sat on - wanted reminders out of the way. This evening the space is a much more poignant reminder.
Now for a few more pictures.



Actually that is George on the plate. You can just see Harry on Ashley's lap.
They both loved Ashley lots.






































George on the left and Harry on the right.







This afternoon we had the task of telling Frieda.
At first I thought she had failed to understand.
I am thankful that we will not have to leave Harry in her care again.

There has been talk of...what next?
I can't actually see us being cat free for too long. I have spent almost all my life with the company of cats.
But we would definitely wait until about next June - after we have been to Thailand.
When I told Lawrence I had always wanted a ginger cat, he told me that ginger cats are always male. I didn't know that. But that's OK - we normally have male cats.

Some good news to start with.
The latest modifications on the denture do seem to have made it more comfortable.
I will see the dentist again in a week's time.
I did get one thing wrong - Mr C said that pain makes people confused and they only remember about 25% of what they are told.
I won't have the permanent denture for about 6 months - it takes that long for the gums to shrink into their final shape.

Then comes the bad news. I can't believe it. There is such conflict between my brain and my heart.
Harry cat still has not eaten.
Surely we could try for just one more week?
But Bill thinks not - his head wins every time. I don't think my heart stands much chance really.
I now keep rehearsing holding Harry and talking to him in those last few minutes.
I did that for Timmy. But I was ill at the time, so we paid extra to have the vet and the nurse come to the house.
Death always has me asking  the question - how can somebody, some pet, be alive one day and dead the next. This evening just feels so normal.

And the day has been normal too.
After the dentist we called in to see Bill's sister, Julie. Good to catch up and enjoy a cup of tea together.
I cooked a chicken casserole for our dinner.

I have enjoyed the constant stream of chat and memories about our town in the old days.
This picture was posted today.





Buses have featured quite a bit in chat.
Also the day when Crawley competed in Its a Knockout. I found  2 great pictures that Bill had taken.

The good news is that both Bill and I have had a good week at the shop.
And I am finding that without other people on duty with us I can get more done than I used to - though I do miss Monika. She came in for a while late in the afternoon.
I can do all my accounts and crossing off of sold items during the morning.
My EBay accounts are still lacking something. An item has not been paid for, despite my having been in touch 3 times and even offered to pay for postal insurance.
That bidder now has 4 days to pay up for the George Best box of handkerchiefs.
Then I can offer it to the under bidder, who must have wanted it quite a lot because his/her top bid was £95.
If all else fails, I just have to start again.
As I write, Harry cat is staring at his food.
It seems staring at it is all he can do.
My brain is telling me what must happen - but I feel so sad; in so many ways he is still the same cat. He is affectionate and bright eyed and not totally lacking in energy.
Why not? After all this time without sustenance he should be at death's door anyway.
And today a niece contacted me to say that her friend, a vet nurse had told her it was always difficult to get cats eating again after extractions. The nurse wondered about trying a convalescent cat food which is mixed with water and can be fed through a syringe. Bill thinks it sounds like cruel force feeding, but I just wonder if it would work.
I am unsettled, wondering what Wednesday will bring.
Tuesday will bring a dental visit for me. My mouth has felt particularly sore and painful for the last 24 hours.
I hope he can modify the denture a bit more to make life easier for me.

We were up early with the plan to go to Woking.
And we st off on our journey with some joy in our hearts.
I had seen Harry cat eat about 4 small mouthfuls of food. Oh, just maybe the option we had chosen was going to really help him?
The roads were almost treacherous at times - with huge puddles, larger flooded spots and fast flowing little rivers either across the road or down the side of the road.
Fortunately, though, the rain had stopped by the time we scurried from the car into Woking leisure centre for the antiques fair.
I bought some things to make a little profit and I also bought knowledge.
One couple had a vast amount of superb West German pottery. It looked quite wonderful - I wanted it all!
Some of the vases were priced at around £200.
I couldn't start spending that much when I know too little about the potteries and their values. But I learned a lot and above all the dealer showed me a good, not too expensive book on the subject.
I bought one vase - I just had to have one!


The generic term for all the West German pottery of the 60s and 70s is fat lava pottery. But in reality only some of it should be referred to as lava pottery.

You can see that a glaze was developed to mimic the lava from a volcano.
This was made at the Roth pottery. I paid £35.

It is some of the very finest pieces of Roth which go for £200 or more.











Another famous ceramic factory is Carlton Ware.
Maybe I have now bought my last piece of it.
I bought a 1930s style model of a liner with the Carlton Ware back stamp.
Except it is a fake.
I can see now that there were clues as to its authenticity - but I though it looked stylish enough to enhance the display of my wares.










My research told me that these ships are fakes.
Now I realise that the pen work for the name of the ship is very amateurish.
I shall still try to sell it - but because I know it is fake I just can't label it without that information.
Sad! Quite a lot of the collectable ceramics of the past are being faked.

But another lesson learned.

We had eggs bendict again in Woking Wetherspoons. I cut mine up into very small pieces and it took ages to eat - but it was tasty and good.

We got home for Bill to watch the Grand Prix and for me to dabble on the Crawley memories site.
We have been to the old swimming pool and to the old track. I put on  a picture of Mary Decker Slaney at the official opening of the all weather track in 1985. People have liked it and lots of people could remember Richard Slaney.
We have been to Smalls Mead - people know many of the families who lived in this first New Town road.
One contributor has the surname Verlander. So I asked if there was a connection with Bob Verlander who worked at Boxall and Collins. Yes - there is a connection but not very close.
Then somebody else with the surname Harris Gulgolka told me that her father used to work with Bob Verlander. Immediately I could see Stan (from Lithuania or some such country). I worked with these 2 men up in the top room of Victoria Garage in the stores. Bob and Stan were stock taking, and I, using an adding machine totted up the totals of what each section was worth. She is so pleased to find somebody who knew him.
This group adds yet another dimension to things I can both get for myself and contribute to by using my computer.

The joy of this morning has melted away. Harry cat has not felt able to eat anything else. If he can't eat, then sadly he can't live.
He is still so loving and doesn't really look very ill.
But it seems time is running out for him.

Some things were almost normal about this Saturday.
We were up early and went to Ford.
I found it hard to concentrate - maybe the cold wind, maybe pain in my mouth or maybe the general malaise and anxiety.
I bought half a dozen things - somethings to keep my section at Dorking ineteresting.
We popped into Littlehampton afterwards for a very short while.
We just had a hot drink in The George. The sun was streaming through the window and it was relaxing.
After a late lunch we went to Lidl - closer than Aldi.
We were happy to meet old friends there.

It was during lunchtime that we realised that this was not a normal Saturday.
We had not spent too long in Littlehampton because we had to get back to take Harry cat to the vet.
Harry is not well. He has not eaten now for almost 10 days.
Lawrence, the vet, said that he is not healing. I guess at his age (16 and a half) maybe his immune system is poor.
Lawrence outline two plans.
The first one involved further surgery to sort out the infected mouth and wounds where extractions had taken place. Obviously he still wouldn't be able to eat, so it was proposed that a feeding tube be inserted into the neck. We would feed him through the tube until such time as his mouth might be healed. But there could be no guarantees that all would be well.
Somehow it didn't sound right and we also worried about cost. That does sound mercenary, but when a cat is old and suffering it might be money completely wasted.
The other option was to give him a high dose antibiotic and much higher pain relief. It could allow some healing.
Once again there could be no guarantee.
It was the option we went for. So we brought him home to begin twice daily medication with morphine.
In our hearts we know, Bill, me and the vet, that probably Harry won't recover.
I think Harry knows too.
An animal can have no concept of the end of life and yet their behaviour often changes - so much so that if they can, they creep away to be alone somewhere to die. Maybe that's what happened to our very first cat.
Harry has been on our bed since coming home from the vet -  a place he hasn't been until today. We will allow him complete choice to stay there.
I did bring him down to sit on me for a while this evening, but he chose to return to the bed and be alone.
On Wednesday we will take him back to Lawrence. If there has been no improvement, then sadly he will not be returning home.

I know that we have made the right choice for Harry. It has to be. But it will be hard - the next few days, and particularly Wednesday.