Sunday, January 02, 2011
The last day of Christmas
Today was our last day of Christmas.
Our decorations pleased us, but were quite few really. Now, they are boxed up again and back in the loft.
I find that just a bit scary.
Gone is the belief of youth that we are immortal - or at least that the end is so far away that it seems like infinity.
As you heard I could once determine what I would do a year hence on a new year's eve.
Now, there has to be that frisson of scariness......what will life be like when it is time (in 50 weeks) to get the boxes back down from the loft?
Hidden behind my desire and hope that old age will be long, satisfying and healthy for both of us, there is the possibility that I am wrong!
There have been a few reminders of mortality along the way.
But, whatever happens, I continue with my philosophy that the past is now a completely foreign land and gone and my future is not yet written.
There is only one moment that I might have some control over - this one.
But now I'm an old old woman,
So I want the last word:
There is no such thing as time--
Only this very minute
And I'm in it.
Thank the Lord.
This is the end of a poem by Joyce Grenfell titled "Time".
And before family and friends beg to argue with me about viewing myself as old.....I don't really. I guess being 90 might be old; and I hope I discover if that is true.
We celebrated this last day of Christmas with a good roast dinner - the gammon I had bought was finally cooked. That sounds like it has had exceedingly long slow cooking! But you know what I mean.
Tomorrow, some sort of normality returns to our world. We will open up the shop in the morning.
I don't know what the extra Bank Holiday tagged onto this period will mean to the people of Dorking - most of the rest of the holiday has meant one thing to many, and that was shopping.
I hope there will be shoppers about.
I hope people will grab the chance to do normal pleasurable things like browsing in a friendly (and cold!) antiques centre.
I finish with a question.....what did I do with the diary that I bought in Poundland in the summer?
It seemed so organised to buy it then.... and so sadly lacking in organisation that I now don't know where it was put.
Maybe I just dreamed that I had bought it.
I keep such a book/diary to jot things down by the computer.
It might have been a pound wasted if it is lost - I shall have to get another one on Tuesday maybe.
Must add that I didn't find the 60th anniversary edition of The Archers to be as "thrilling" as advertised.
Our decorations pleased us, but were quite few really. Now, they are boxed up again and back in the loft.
I find that just a bit scary.
Gone is the belief of youth that we are immortal - or at least that the end is so far away that it seems like infinity.
As you heard I could once determine what I would do a year hence on a new year's eve.
Now, there has to be that frisson of scariness......what will life be like when it is time (in 50 weeks) to get the boxes back down from the loft?
Hidden behind my desire and hope that old age will be long, satisfying and healthy for both of us, there is the possibility that I am wrong!
There have been a few reminders of mortality along the way.
But, whatever happens, I continue with my philosophy that the past is now a completely foreign land and gone and my future is not yet written.
There is only one moment that I might have some control over - this one.
But now I'm an old old woman,
So I want the last word:
There is no such thing as time--
Only this very minute
And I'm in it.
Thank the Lord.
This is the end of a poem by Joyce Grenfell titled "Time".
And before family and friends beg to argue with me about viewing myself as old.....I don't really. I guess being 90 might be old; and I hope I discover if that is true.
We celebrated this last day of Christmas with a good roast dinner - the gammon I had bought was finally cooked. That sounds like it has had exceedingly long slow cooking! But you know what I mean.
Tomorrow, some sort of normality returns to our world. We will open up the shop in the morning.
I don't know what the extra Bank Holiday tagged onto this period will mean to the people of Dorking - most of the rest of the holiday has meant one thing to many, and that was shopping.
I hope there will be shoppers about.
I hope people will grab the chance to do normal pleasurable things like browsing in a friendly (and cold!) antiques centre.
I finish with a question.....what did I do with the diary that I bought in Poundland in the summer?
It seemed so organised to buy it then.... and so sadly lacking in organisation that I now don't know where it was put.
Maybe I just dreamed that I had bought it.
I keep such a book/diary to jot things down by the computer.
It might have been a pound wasted if it is lost - I shall have to get another one on Tuesday maybe.
Must add that I didn't find the 60th anniversary edition of The Archers to be as "thrilling" as advertised.
