Grandma P's Ramblings Through Life

I wish I could tell you that the reason for a brief, lifeless blog is because we have been too busy gallivanting.
That is what people normally do on their wedding anniversary.
But we didn't feel the need today - and this evening I feel fragile.

The day has been very normal - though we were both thinking back 44 years and noting what we might have been doing at particular times.
Without any celebration to mark the occasion, we still feel that we have celebrated just being together.

On that day 44 years ago I attended what I think was the first wedding I had been to. I had nobody else's views about what a wedding should be - except many of my college friends, also planning weddings at that time. I felt daunted by what they seemed to think a wedding should be and I created a day that we will always remember and without most of the formal trappings of a wedding ceremony.

My dress was short. I had no veil. I arrived at the church in an old Fiat, driven by one of Bill's workmates. My family walked to the church. We had no photographer. The reception was held in the newly built garage and work shop at my parent's home. I did have a "proper" bouquet, donated by some neighbours. The worst breaking of the rules was that Bill and I spent all the morning, prior to the wedding, together - preparing things for the reception. The reception was interrupted by the arrival of some Indian carpet salesmen. Were there speeches? I really don't know.

There were some photographs - people had cameras with them.
Bill asked friends to take some pictures using his camera - and it went wrong!

Below is an interesting picture that shouldn't have been possible I guess - 2 shots of us outside the local church.



It was so good we did it twice!

I am glad now that our wedding day really reflects who we are - not that I had any idea of who we were, at the tender age of 20.

The years have been good. Poor Bill has had to dig deep for the "in sickness" bit of the vows. He has needed to provide a lot of support - and still does.

So another year of our married life begins.
We have an October holiday to look forward to. The little cottage is booked in North East Kent.
Who knows what lies ahead really.

Kent - county of my ancestors.
I am a Maid of Kent, having been born to the south east of the River Medway.
We assumed that all our maternal ancestors came from Kent. My mother's father's family seem mostly to hail from various Kentish towns and villages.
It was comparatively recently that cousin Alison discovered that mother's mother's family had not always been Kentish people.
I think our mother would have been surprised to learn that her mother was actually born in Cheshire - not the select genteel Cheshire, but rather the outskirts of Manchester.
People travelled much more than many people might have realised.

Following one line of my mother's family back we come to Caroline Mallion, my gr gr gr grandmother.
If we move to her brother John, a different line of descendants appeared, leading to Mark who now lives in the USA. His family have lived in Rhodesia and South Africa.

Mark is now amongst my facebook contacts.

And bless him he is posting family photographs.

I have sat staring at this one below for a long time. I couldn't see straight away just what was hypnotising me.
Was it me..... was it my mother?
It is actually Mark's great grandmother Florence (nee Mallion), aged about 50.



Then I covered the good lady's mouth and gasped! There were even some tears.
It was me!
See what you think?



When Bill appeared I asked who he was looking at and straight away said it was me.

Perhaps I shouldn't claim Welsh heritage from the Jones side of the family as I have done since childhood. Mother's mother's family were originally from Wales before they moved to Manchester and then south to Kent.
Perhaps I truly am a Maid of Kent and carry Mallion genes.

And so it is a serendipity thing that Bill and I began to think about a week's holiday in October and opted not to travel far - instead to explore East Kent.
I think we have found just the place and it appears to be free when we want it.
I'll sort it out in the morning.
The place is called The Pig Barn! Yes, it was the pig barn once and is within a farmyard at the village of Chislet. It will cost £220 for the week. The conversion into holiday cottage looks superb.

Today has been busy.
Well, some things feel organised now.
The cupboard (or fridge) is no longer bare.
We went to Asda before half past eight - shopping is very easy at that time.
We stopped on the way because a man with a white stick was seemingly ignored by a bus driver. I guess the elderly man was dithering and didn't put his arm out like they say you should. We then drove him to his doctor's appointment.
I have sorted out appointments.
There was much confusion about an ultra sound scan I am due to have before seeing urology team.
The X Ray department told me when the appointment is for - 6 hours after I see the doctor!
So now I will see the doctor 3 weeks later than planned.
We have been to Lidl for a few bits and enjoyed a sociable time - Bill's cousin's husband was in there ( the one that has been mayor.). Give us a ring he said to arrange when we could round and open a bottle of wine - and at last sort out some family history with Bill's cousin and tell her more about the Ellises and Brands.
Then we met Al who has been a past chairman of Crawley Athletics Club. His wife nursed me after the hysterectomy - 25 years ago.

This afternoon I cleaned and sorted all my stock items that were bought at car boot sales during the last 2 weeks or so. They are all written up and ready for shop or EBay.
Bill, bless him, sorted out the rooms Ashley and Ekatarina had used. Then he dusted and vacuumed everywhere.

We have no plans for tomorrow - our 44th wedding anniversary.
I like that number - 44.
It was the year of my birth just south of Tonbridge in Kent.

Ashley and Ekatarina left us at 10 o'clock this morning.
There was a mood of sadness in the air, which we all tried to disguise.
Partings are too abrupt really - one moment you are living life as though it will go on as before - and the next minute, life does not go on as before.
I felt such a heart ache as I hugged my son and my grand daughter and watched them walk away to the platform for their train.
A precious 2 weeks is now in the past.
Silly me! I shall see them again 5 weeks today.
We have loads of boxes to take up to Bangor.

I failed to get going on anything very much today. My body and mind needed a nothing day. New beginnings can wait until tomorrow.
I knew I was too weary to think of attending the athletics meeting we had been booked to do - so Bill phoned up the Brighton club and said we wouldn't be there. I feel a bit guilty to let people down.

This afternoon we went out to do a few chores - as we seem to do quite often. There was a box for the charity shop, a trip to B &Q, rubbish to be deposited at the dump and a trip to the pet shop for cat food and more fat balls for the birds.
If the place which supplied and fitted out stair carpet had been open on a Wednesday afternoon we might have stopped there. It is a small family run firm and we liked them.
The fact is we are about to indulge ourselves, having made a mistake last year. Well, my mistake really!
We had carpet in our kitchen/ dining room/office for many years. It didn't show the dirt - but I didn't like it.
So when we had the new kitchen done I chose something I did like, but it really shows the dirt and I think it will have to go.
My birthday present will be vinyl flooring I think.
I would love ceramic tiles but that would be very expensive because the floor would need a great deal of preparation.
I will not hear of Bill doing the work because he has enough problems with his knees and muscles. Next week he will return to the doctor about swollen ankles and legs. He needs exercise, yes - but not crawling round a floor on his hands and knees.
Maybe we'll go and see them this week - the flooring people, that is.

Bill has cut the lawns today.
He got chatting with a near neighbour who has been vociferous in objections to the medical centre and has heard things on the grapevine.
She seems to have picked up that things are not as far ahead as we believed. The council have given planning permission - but the Primary care trust has not had a positive go ahead and she suggested that the land has not actually been bought yet.
Who knows?
We can but dream that it will all fall through.

The house has an air of eerie normality about it now. There is still tidying to do. I think Bill has been packing up all Ecky's things. It quite hurt wandering into her room and having it look like she might still be there!
We have watched our favourite soaps for the first time in ages and I shall see Who Do You Think You Are at 9 o'clock.
I played Boggle at lunchtime against Roger - welcome back Roger and Sue.
Tomorrow I must catch up on sorting out things bought at recent car boot sales.

I guess I should tell you 2 versions of the day - but it will all be fairly brief.

The day for Bill and me involved the shop.
It has been very busy. It took me almost all day to right up the 23 Beatrix Potter books.
We had so many customers and weird and wonderful requests.
There were 2 ladies looking for coffee spoons - OK I could cope with that; and I knew what sugar tongs were...... but sugar spoons? Surely you just use one of your teaspoons from the cutlery drawer!
But, as ever, everybody was very nice.
We were not completely sure of the lad who came in with items for us to buy. Where did he get the stuff? I am ashamed to be suspicious really because all he confessed to was that he couldn't read and write - this was when I asked him if it might be worthwhile selling on EBay. There are still too many poor readers, but it is unusual to have no skills - what sort of backgrounds is he from?
Anyway we didn't want to buy his stuff.
There were Australians, French people and a couple en route between France and their home in Tipperary.
All were buying.
The most unusual encounter was with the 3 women from Dubai, all in long black robes and 2 with gold appendages to restrict our vision of eyes etc. There was a British driver with them to carry their purchases to the car.
They were buying quite a bit - and unfortunately breaking some things too. Long black robes are hard to manoeuvre through restricted spaces.
They paid for the breakage.
I was wrapping as quickly as possible, for I felt that they wanted it all done in double quick time.

Bill and I were the only workers today. Monika was away and Julie, well - Mondays are a few hours out being sociable for Julie. She does very little.

Bill and I sold today.

Ashley and Ekatarina have also been out.
They got the bus to Gatwick - simply to ride on the driverless train between terminals.
Then they went to Horsham.
Ecky played in the park.
Then they went to MacDonalds - Ashley had vouchers for meals. Magnificent, thought Ecky - a children's indoor play area upstairs.
She played with a little girl, from Crawley, named Poppy.
Then they went to the museum - stopping at another play area on the way.
Ecky found an amethyst bracelet at the museum a couple of years ago, which has now broken. She wanted to replace it. But there were none there today.
They visited all the charity shops - and bought nothing. Why do the charity shops have so little that is interesting these days?
And then they went back to Gatwick for another ride on that train.
And then caught the bus home.
I think they got back in just before the rain started.

This evening has been gentle - High School Musical 3 is on for much of the time.
I was so tired tonight that Ecky read to me - all about the Tudor Kings and Queens.

It is the last day with A & E tomorrow. And Ecky is excited because Florence is coming round to play.

I guess that today has been a normal Sunday - in most respects.
The difference has been that searching at car boot sales has centred on what an 8 year old girl might be wanting.
She wants lots - and the car boot sales supply lots at very reasonable prices.

We went to Pease Pottage this morning.
Well, I have learned a lot about Pokemon today. This evening we have been exploring web sites telling of the history of Pokemon. We even found aeroplanes with Pokemon characters painted on them.
Ecky also found one of the modern Sindy dolls - changed from the original, but still nicer than Barbie.
And there were loads more books, CDs etc.
Bill and I didn't buy much. I bought a lamp - it looks sort of art deco with a bronze female and a lovely shade, but it is modern. I also bought 23 Beatrix Potter books in dust wrappers in very fine condition for £2 - they will sell for £1.50 each.
I will take the lamp to the shop tomorrow.

We were home in good time to enjoy a relaxing morning.
My, how we need some rest!

Then we went to Edenbridge.
By midday the air had become hot and humid and our weariness actually turned to lethargy.
Lethargy seemed to hit Edenbridge.
There were loads of stalls, but it felt quite and lacking that certain "buzz".
Only Ekatarina came away satisfied - with Periwinkle, a TY bear and a Pixelchix item she has coveted. It is called Roomies. Sorry - too tired to explain! Just know that this £50 toy was bought for £2.

We pottered for the rest of the day - dozed, watched TV - and High School Musical 3 (newly acquired).
Dinner was based round cold sausages and ham from previous meals - so very easy.

Tomorrow Bill and I will be at the shop. Ashley will take Ekatarina to Horsham for a while.
And today Ecky was thrilled because we have arranged that on Tuesday Florence will come to play. Shame that her favourite friend lives 300 miles from her.

And now for a cup of tea and then into bed - and maybe another dose of immodium!

After heavy over night rain, when 2 inches fell in just a few hours, we wondered if we would have a stay at home day.
We were home this morning when Ruth, Felix and Otto came to call.
Oh my - Felix has become a "terrible two".
He was thwarted once and proceeded to display just how much mess could be made with a few Pringles! Ooh what a temper!
But soon there were smiles again.

The rain stopped at about midday, but it was still a very grey day.

After lunch we decided to go out - just for a short while.
We stopped first at the visitor's centre for The Ashdown Forest.
Ekatarina did some colouring and met some of the forest inhabitants - well these are ex inhabitants now.





Then we drove a little further to enjoy the misty view.
We walked just a little from the road.
We enjoyed the different heathers .
This one, we thought, might be bell heather.

Ekatarina already knows a great deal about William the Conqueror - she loves history. So, it was interesting to see places connected with him.
Of course in tracing back the family tree we find that we are descended from William the Conqueror - so he is more than just the Norman invader; he is our many greats grandfather!
Our visit to the ruined castle began with a film.
We learned about the Battle of Hastings and how the castle was built and how it ended up a ruin.
Here are some pictures we all took at the castle of us exploring and having a good time.


This was part of the church within the castle.